I had a dream

Once you were gone
I had a dream
where I did everything right.
When your sister died
I drove you 600 miles
to be there
at her funeral
with you.
Instead of driving you
to the airport
and watching you drag your bag
across two lanes of traffic
through the cold sliding doors.
I brought your cell phone
to where you work
instead of pretending
I couldn’t find it.
I made love to you
everytime
you wanted it.
Everytime
you needed it.
Instead of saying
I was busy
or wasn’t in the mood.
I laughed at all your jokes
and listened to you
instead of reading my book
or watching my show.
I held your hand in public
and kissed you
when you least expected it.
Instead of walking
ahead of you.
I told you I loved you
and meant it
instead of staring at you
silently
when you said it.
I stopped you from leaving
by standing between you
and the door.
Instead of standing at the door
and watching you leave.
Once you were gone
I had a dream
where I did everything right
and you didn’t leave at all.